I am afraid Rachel must be confused, or have delusions of grandeur about her 400 Baht a night fan room. We try to deliver exactly what is described on AirBNB and I believe in this case, we did, as well.
1 - I agree that the M&M Lakehouse is not the easiest place to find. I sent 8 files to Rachel 3 times by email. These files contain information and photos of how to get here in Thai and English. She said she never received the emails I sent...not sure why.
2 - Upon inspection of the check-in document Rachel signed, I does state that we are not responsible for lost items (of course) it also sates that there is a safe in the room. Some rooms do have safes, but this document will be revised thanks to Rachel. This document is from a template and this item was over-looked. The AirBNB description does not claim a safe is in this room.
3 - The door had an operating lock. In fact, I went to the room and demonstrated to them how to use it. This room also has a locking hasp which can also be used. She did not request a pad-lock, or express any concern after I did my late night lock demonstration. The AirBNB decription states that the room has a lock, which it does.
4 - Yes, the bicycles are free for guest use and they are in reasonable repair with functioning brakes. I informed Rachel that in order to use the bikes, I would have to pump up the tires on one of the bikes first, which would take only a minute.
Rachel wanted to take the bikes over a steep hill to Patong Beach. For safety reasons, I advised against this. The hill is quite steep with heavy traffic. The bikes are single speed and not designed for this type of journey. I said, "You can ride the bikes over the hill, but I recommend against it". She wisely took my recommendation. To be honest, I would not even ride a 21 speed touring bicycle with disc brakes over Patong hill.
5 - The nearest beach is about 4 km away, I think that is close. I explained to Rachel how to take the bus & the limitations of the public transportation system in Phuket. I asked her if she wanted to rent a motorbike.
6 - The M&M Lakehouse is in a village like setting. It can be expected that there will be some noise from animals, which I cannot control. We were not advised of any noise problems during Rachels stay, or we would try to assist.
7 - In the tropics you can expect to find geckos and the occasional insect in the room. To be honest, I can really do nothing about a gecko, or 2. We are happy to spray the room, upon request.
I am sorry Rachel did not enjoy her stay here. She stayed only 2 nights and as she said we had little interaction. We are happy to assist our guest as best we can.
I am particularly concerned that she claims the door lock did not work, after I demonstrated exactly how to use it. And even more concerned when I receive a complaint after giving good advise on preventing turning a holiday into a hospital stay.