Response from Axel:
Thank you dearly for your feedback, me and the other housemates have had a good laugh.
I can't speak for what your security measures are at your own abode, but I suspect the front door was unlocked because there was somebody home, who was aware of your impending arrival. I can't speak for the kind of community you come from, but there are some that exist where there is enough trust to not need security codes. A locked door is not going to stop a thief who wants to break in.
After an inspection of the house today for cobwebs and broken glass, none to few were found, only in the most inhumanly possible reaches. Unless you refer to the backyard, where there are enough, yes. Welcome to Australia.
Thank you for pointing out there was underwear in our house, I forgot I put that there.
Incredibly dusty is an exaggeration where truth has lost its temper, unless you took some dust with you, as I can't find an incredible amount. That staled smell is the result of the room being closed up for a week prior to your arrival, I apologize for that, that's my smell and I left that there. As for my poor fan, please leave him out of this. Did it not tell you that he has settings? Light, Medium, High?
There are no bedbugs in my bed, I appreciate that you had a go 3 nights on it, but my years of experience outweighs your temp residential status, I would have long ago burnt and disposed of it if they existed. I can refer you to plenty of women who have also shared the same bed that we have now also shared, if you are not satisfied with just my word. As for the bean bag, I"m going to assume you havn't ever owned a lovesac or equivalent. If you have, you'd know that washing it isnt as easy as putting it in the washing machine (which you were too afraid to look at, for some reason). It's 2 years old now and has got some food and beverage stains, sorry for that too.
For an outdoor swimming pool surrounded by mango trees, It's irrational to think you can catch the leaves before they die and fall in the water. The "swamp" situation is a product of your hyperactive imagination, an hour after putting chlorine in it after being away for 2 weeks and it's delightful.
Your expectation of entertainment must far exceed ours, how can a ping pong table "barely" be a ping pong table if its got a table top, legs, a net, balls and rackets? Also if you cared to look, you would of found a pool table underneath, a projector to plug your laptop or our PS3 into, and a massage chair in the corner. Now that's entertainment.
The kitchen sink did have dishes in it, but I think you need to steer clear of it's Archaeology and stick to writing reviews, as those dishes weren't there when I left the house. There are other guests, mind you. Some things are out of my control.
The bathroom has a light, turn it on. I got a report of multiple people being in the bathroom from other guests, but I am glad that it turned out to be nothing more serious than just you being frightened. That stain in the bathtub is a mystery to me too, but with a bit of logic, my imagination settles and declares that it could just be aged tiles losing colour. The house is over 100 years old.
All in all I'm glad you were able to escape your bubble and see a small percentage of what Australia is, you got a look behind the scenes. Perhaps next time you should spend more cash and get a hotel or an apartment in the city.